So for those of you who don't know, Shannon has a blog dedicated to our finding a kid through the state. We went to adoption classes and her blog describes that.
Here is the link to that: http://lovetoreed.blogspot.com/
Enjoy!
I will be updating things next week on my blog! In the mean time, hope all is well with everyone.
Love and hugs,
J
Friday, March 25, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
A day in the life of a lesbian dad...
Way back in the day, when Shannon and I first got married, we had strange thoughts of little two-leggers running around our house. Everyone knows we have enough four-leggers, though give us credit, as we are not as bad as my sister with her 7! Or is it 8 now? I forget. Anyway, we have had many, many conversations about human babies running around our home.
We made the decision to start the process of making a baby, like any other couple would: with some good ole sperm and an egg. This decision required some serious thought for us, since neither of us has sperm, though one of my previous girlfriends had become pregnant in the past (I do, however, have a suspicion that it wasn't mine). We looked online and found OHSU, found a donor that matched my background pretty closely, and we ordered some of his little buddies. We fondly call him NENO, because of the number initials of his sample, 9890.
We also decided that we would attend adoption classes, just in case things didn't work out with the insemination process. Those are 15 hours of my life that I will never have back, but also 15 hours of my life that were truly worth it. There are so many kids out there that need someone to be there for them. It breaks my heart to know they are hurting. I wish I could save them all...
More post will come on "kid status" at later dates! Stay tuned!
Now, when we decided on a two-legger, it wasn't a difficult decision on who would carry. It was pretty obvious it wouldn't be me, since I got spayed a few years ago. We had talked about harvesting an egg from me, with my one dried up old ovary left, but that would be way complicated, and not something I am ready to deal with at this point. I have enough health problems without intentionally giving myself more.
So, naturally, Shannon will be the one with the sprout growing, and is going to be Mom. This brought up the question: What am I going to be called? I've thought about it before, and have been thinking about it a great deal. I, too, could go by Mom, but that could get complicated and confusing. I could go by mommy or something similar, but also, that would be confusing. Dad was an option, which I find amusing, though may cause some issues to our children when they get older. I am just not sure.
The one that I have come back to so many times is Ina. It means Mother in many Native tongues. Our donor is part of the Osage tribe, and I thought it would be a nice tribute to him, since, without him, we wouldn't even have a chance at having kids, and he kind of started us on the path of trying to become parents. I also think there won't be any confusion for our kids between who they are talking to, since Mom and Ina sound so different. Even if our kid isn't from this donor, I still like Ina...I think I have grown fond of it, so I think I will stick with it. Hopefully our kids will be able to say it!
So that is one day in the life of becoming a lesbian dad. It is a very complicated process, which I will explain at a later date, I hope!
We made the decision to start the process of making a baby, like any other couple would: with some good ole sperm and an egg. This decision required some serious thought for us, since neither of us has sperm, though one of my previous girlfriends had become pregnant in the past (I do, however, have a suspicion that it wasn't mine). We looked online and found OHSU, found a donor that matched my background pretty closely, and we ordered some of his little buddies. We fondly call him NENO, because of the number initials of his sample, 9890.
We also decided that we would attend adoption classes, just in case things didn't work out with the insemination process. Those are 15 hours of my life that I will never have back, but also 15 hours of my life that were truly worth it. There are so many kids out there that need someone to be there for them. It breaks my heart to know they are hurting. I wish I could save them all...
More post will come on "kid status" at later dates! Stay tuned!
Now, when we decided on a two-legger, it wasn't a difficult decision on who would carry. It was pretty obvious it wouldn't be me, since I got spayed a few years ago. We had talked about harvesting an egg from me, with my one dried up old ovary left, but that would be way complicated, and not something I am ready to deal with at this point. I have enough health problems without intentionally giving myself more.
So, naturally, Shannon will be the one with the sprout growing, and is going to be Mom. This brought up the question: What am I going to be called? I've thought about it before, and have been thinking about it a great deal. I, too, could go by Mom, but that could get complicated and confusing. I could go by mommy or something similar, but also, that would be confusing. Dad was an option, which I find amusing, though may cause some issues to our children when they get older. I am just not sure.
The one that I have come back to so many times is Ina. It means Mother in many Native tongues. Our donor is part of the Osage tribe, and I thought it would be a nice tribute to him, since, without him, we wouldn't even have a chance at having kids, and he kind of started us on the path of trying to become parents. I also think there won't be any confusion for our kids between who they are talking to, since Mom and Ina sound so different. Even if our kid isn't from this donor, I still like Ina...I think I have grown fond of it, so I think I will stick with it. Hopefully our kids will be able to say it!
So that is one day in the life of becoming a lesbian dad. It is a very complicated process, which I will explain at a later date, I hope!
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